Friday, 13 November 2009

Second love

In today’s newspaper I saw an ad that had made quite an impression. It was very small – 4,5cm by 10cm and had only some text in black with a black line around it. For some seconds I was staring at it in disbelief. When the first shock passed, I was very amused, though. Here’s the text (I tried to keep the style and grammar of my English translation as similar to the original as possible):
Is cheating on your partner acceptable or not?
From October 2008 Second love is brought on the market and already a big success. The gross of the visitors is very satisfied with the service which shows from the many reactions we receive.

Chat, e-mail as well as meeting in reality or an affair appear to have a positive effect on their feeling of happiness and/or home life. Naturally, the visitors decide for themselves how far they want to go. The website only helps to find those similarly minded who miss excitement in their current relationship.
Life is short, have a Second love.”

I wonder: if accepting and regulating prostitution leads to less casualties among prostitutes, and accepting and regulating drugs leads to a lesser drug use, would accepting and regulating of cheating lead to less cheating? I think we need some legal basis for cheating – might be a good solution for this problem.


  1. Nice to read that Dutch people still want to be happy in this life. I thougt that they have given up long ago and are trying to use what is accessible.

  2. Trying to use what is accessible? What do you mean? BTW, I once saw results of a research which say Dutch are one of the most happy nations in the world. :)

  3. It seems that Dutch try to regulate all sins in they country. The only questions about adultery- if it comes out how "toleraant" they are to accept the truth and live further?

  4. @sasja
    Do you think Dutch people are happy,especially Dutch ladies ?If yes why dutch ladies are looking around any time even they are in a relationship?My statistical sample is fair enough to testify my verdict .....

  5. @Anonymous The fact that Dutch regulate 'sins' is a sign of low hypocrisy - I like that. And it seems tolerance towards adultery is high enough if such a website exists, such an ad is published by a newspaper and there is no fuss about it.

    Dutch are very happy with their country and the high life quality level. As to Dutch ladies, I don't think they look around more than ladies in any other country. What do you men by your "statistical sample"?

  6. While I'm reading this discussion (interesting topic Sasja!) I realize that I hate anonimity when there's a discussion going on. Who is anonymous? And where do you come from? What are the "rules" on cheating where you come from?

  7. @all
    Let's define what is cheating .

  8. @Sotiris
    Cheat - to trick or deceive someone who trusts you.
    Cheat on sb - to be unfaithful to your husband, wife or sexual partner by secretly having sex with someone else.
    (Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English)

  9. @Sasja
    Let's define cheating according Dutch culture :)

  10. @Sotiris How do you think Dutch define cheating?

  11. @Sasja
    I have been in Holland since Sept 1992 .
    Most of my time I am in West part of Holland like Rotterdam,Den Haag and short time in Amsterdam.
    Think for dutch ladies there is no cheating from their side.Body is belonging to them so they control their body.

  12. @Sotiris So how do you think Dutch define cheating?

    And my body belongs to me and to me only. Ever. Your body belongs to you and to you only. Ever. What's that got to do with cheating?

  13. @Sasja
    In my opinion,
    most of dutch ladies are unfaithful to their partners just because of freedom.Freedom is not the priviledge to do anything that fulfill our egoism just to get the pleasure.In a partnership ,any form of partnership like a relationship,a marriage ,there are some important principles like compromise,sacrifice,communication,understanding,love.
    If you are in a relationship that it doesn;t fullfill your expectations just leave him/her,leave the house.Not being with him/her to share the cost of living expenses and looking around for a new partner or a victim,you name it,until you find a new one to move in a new house.That;s is a hypocrisy.Maybe the same does apply to other countries but not in a level like Holland.

  14. @Sotiris I don't think Dutch women are more unfaithful on average than women in other countries. Despite all the freedom around here Dutch have quite high moral standards. But Dutch are very direct and quite open when it come to sex and relationships issues. That's why unfaithfulness is more visible. In other countries this is a taboo subject, nobody talks about it or shows it. I think Greek women cheat as much as Dutch. But they hide it better.

    BTW, what do you think of Dutch men - are they cheating more than men in other countries?

  15. @Sasja
    I agree.Direct and quite open behaviour on sex and relationship matters are WIDE visible in Holland.Think it kills the GAME OF SEDUCTION ;)
    I have no experience with Greek women ,never or seldom had the chance to be with a greek woman who accept my standards ,sorry .
    About Dutch men? They have no problem on cheating ,chicken farm is full of chickens :)
    Also I have notice that they like mediteranean or asian ladies other than Dutch ladies ......
    Am I wrong ?

  16. @Sasja
    I believe that our adult life is depended on the principles and lessons which we took from our family life .


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