Running late

I’m running late. Sometimes a wave of panic covers my body with cold sweat. I am running out of time. It took me too much time to learn surviving without too much effort. I took too long to realise there’s no reason to follow a conventional path. It lasted ages before I discovered my strengths, weaknesses, desires, needs, myself really.

It’s too late for me to develop my acting skills on professional level. It’s late to become a dancer for competitions. I’m late with being a young successful whatever. Now it’s more and more catching up, hoping I’m not a well established loser. It’s too late to choose a profession. I’m running late for earning enough money for my dream house or a good retirement allowance. It’s getting late for getting children – this thought is the most scary of them all.

I’m running late and I feel the pressure so bad at times, I can hardly move. I try to wave away the time and the thoughts of it and do some chaotic attempts to move in the right direction. If I only knew what the right direction was..