Sunday, 29 September 2013

How to succeed with women

A couple of years ago I found this book on my boyfriend’s shelf. ‘How to succeed with women’ the title said. Intrigued I read nearly half of the book right under the book shelf. I learned a couple of things:
- My boyfriend did not read it;
- The vast majority of advice makes total sense;
- Reading this kind of stuff reveals some things about men in general.

I wanted to read the whole book, but had to put it off for a while because of the permanent lack of time and different priorities. But then I stumbled upon the blog of RooshV. The author of the blog travels around the world trying to have (unpaid) sex with as many women as possible. Afterwards he makes practical travel guides for guys. Apparently the books sell well enough to help him keep on travelling. Before RooshV started producing his travel guides, he wrote a book called ‘Bang’. “Bang is a pickup textbook intended for men who weren't born with the natural ability to sleep with a lot of women. It contains simple but powerful techniques, moves, and lines that offer a direct line to casual sex.”

I know, I know: there’s no one single recipe, no two women are the same and getting laid should not be a goal of any self-respecting man. Nonetheless, a lot of advice in these books makes perfect sense. As a small example here’s an excerpt from the Bang: “We don’t use direct game, where we walk up to a girl and tell her she is beautiful.” According to RooshV men shouldn't do this because that would increase the woman’s value relative to that of the approaching man. That wouldn't be my reasoning, but please, men, do as he says! It might sound counter-productive, but it ‘s true. It might signal that you are not really interested in her intellect and personality, that you are boring or that you are not prepared to make more effort. Whether you want quick sex or a long-lasting relationship – those are not the signals to send.

If men took this seriously and internalised at least a little part of the recommendations life would be a lot more pleasant. So guys, whatever your aims and status, please do read your literature. It’s there for a reason. And if you happen to know of any female equivalents of those books, please do let me know.

This is very beautiful: Soha - Mil pasos


  1. I do read my literature and I learn a great deal of it. It occurs to me that a lot is totally counter-intuitive, but true. There's a book "Male sexuality: Why women don't understand it - and men don't either" (haven't read it yet).
    I think that the reverse is also true. Women often say they want a sweet and caring guy, but unfortunately those guys often end up in the 'friend zone'. It seems that bastards have far better chances of getting laid. So you might as well say: "Female sexuality: Why men don't understand it - and women don't either."

    1. Arjan, concerning our sexuality you are totally right. Neither men nor women understand any of it. Frankly, I think it's too complicated.

      With long-term relationships I think most women know what they want, although many might have difficulties articulating that. And I think that is because women (or men) don't learn to think about their relationships as a sort of business. This, in turn leads to a lot of disappointment, pain and wasted time. Relationships should be a compulsory subject at school.

  2. haha, so true, relationships can be thought of as a sort of business. And it should be a compulsory subject at school indeed!

    Personally, I don't believe that the complexity of the matter makes it so difficult to understand. Maybe it's just because the underlying psychological processes are not fully accessible to introspection.


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