How to succeed with women

A couple of years ago I found this book on my boyfriend’s shelf. ‘How to succeed with women’ the title said. Intrigued I read nearly half of the book right under the book shelf. I learned a couple of things:
- My boyfriend did not read it;
- The vast majority of advice makes total sense;
- Reading this kind of stuff reveals some things about men in general.

I wanted to read the whole book, but had to put it off for a while because of the permanent lack of time and different priorities. But then I stumbled upon the blog of RooshV. The author of the blog travels around the world trying to have (unpaid) sex with as many women as possible. Afterwards he makes practical travel guides for guys. Apparently the books sell well enough to help him keep on travelling. Before RooshV started producing his travel guides, he wrote a book called ‘Bang’. “Bang is a pickup textbook intended for men who weren't born with the natural ability to sleep with a lot of women. It contains simple but powerful techniques, moves, and lines that offer a direct line to casual sex.”

I know, I know: there’s no one single recipe, no two women are the same and getting laid should not be a goal of any self-respecting man. Nonetheless, a lot of advice in these books makes perfect sense. As a small example here’s an excerpt from the Bang: “We don’t use direct game, where we walk up to a girl and tell her she is beautiful.” According to RooshV men shouldn't do this because that would increase the woman’s value relative to that of the approaching man. That wouldn't be my reasoning, but please, men, do as he says! It might sound counter-productive, but it ‘s true. It might signal that you are not really interested in her intellect and personality, that you are boring or that you are not prepared to make more effort. Whether you want quick sex or a long-lasting relationship – those are not the signals to send.

If men took this seriously and internalised at least a little part of the recommendations life would be a lot more pleasant. So guys, whatever your aims and status, please do read your literature. It’s there for a reason. And if you happen to know of any female equivalents of those books, please do let me know.

This is very beautiful: Soha - Mil pasos

Poor

Netherlands is poor. The recession has hit us so hard, we couldn’t withstand it. And now we are all broke, poor beggars. Newspapers dedicate whole chapters to poverty and poor people. Second hand and thrift shops keep on popping up around the town. Food banks scream for help because they are not able to feed the ever-growing number of clients. Even big shops try to give tips on saving and doing things on a tight budget.

I don’t know how the latest issue of AH Wathandig found its way to our kitchen table. I came down for a super late brunch today and saw it there. I never pick up this magazine at the supermarket because it contains literally nothing but advertising. I must have opened it on a wrong page, but the first thing I saw: “Nowadays I cut open the seemingly empty tubes of toothpaste and cream. I still get quite a lot of product out of them this way.” Dûh!

Never mind, I turn a couple of pages. It’s time to budget-decorate the house. Take a large sheet of coloured cardboard; collects all kinds of (s)craps: dry tree leaves, postcards, cut-outs of cute cats and Bambies from magazines (in short: stuff that belongs in the dustbin); tape all that to the cardboard. For that you will only need to buy a set of three rolls of decorative tape for €2.59 and probably a large sheet of coloured cardboard. And maybe some foam to strengthen the cardboard. Ok maybe a cute postcard or two. Voilà! (Euh, why would you want to do this?) The magazine also gives tips on how to uselessly deploy the leftovers of the decorative tape.

Here's a how-to

If you are poor, you don’t throw things away. You repurpose. Here’s how to repurpose old little toys once your kid stopped playing with them. Collect some glass jars with a lid; glue the toy to the lid; spray the lid and the toy with paint = done! You just need to buy some suitable glue (from €2.29). And a spray can of paint or several spray cans if you want your jars in different colours. Now all you have to do is to find some crap to keep in those jars. Of course you can always buy something.

I think the recession did not hit us hard enough. There’s still room to go until we have no useless stuff around the house to repurpose and no money to buy supplies for useless ‘home decorations’. Then we’ll be closer to poor. We might also become much happier then.

No blood

To our huge disappointment there was no blood. The mouse was not dead and not even slightly injured because the cat did not bite her at all. He only lightly touched her with his paw to encourage her to move if she spent too long a time in one corner. He played with her for hours and the most time was taken by waiting in this or that corner. Every once in a while the mouse felt caught and then she would stand on her back paws and look the cat straight in the eye. And that pussy of a cat would back up!

We comforted ourselves with the notion that the mouse was afraid of the cat and that mice might leave our house just to avoid the horror of being chased by the cat around the house for hours. She was definitely more afraid of him than of us and let herself be caught in a glass and brought to the neighbouring street. Whoever got her now in their house must be delighted.

Even though the cat let us do half of the work to let the mouse disappear, I still consider the operation quite successful and thinking of placing the cat food closer to the vent in the kitchen where more mice might come through. Or should I let the mice be? Experience shows that when you teach your baby the names of different animals it’s very convenient to actually have these animals at hand.

Maybe we should also get a fox: Ylvis - The Fox

Predator

The famous National Geographic & University of Georgia Kitty Cams (Crittercam)Project revealed that domestic free-roaming cats hunt and bring 23% of their prey home as a present for their owners. 28% is eaten and 49% is left to (die and) rot on the site.

Up to yesterday my cat had brought home two birds (one of them to the baby room, isn't that sweet?) and one butterfly. If we apply the statistics that would mean that he had eaten 3.65 animals and left 6.39 bodies on the site. I saw him dismembering a dragon fly in the garden once. He didn't eat it.

But that was up to yesterday. Yesterday he spent a few hours hunting a mouse indoors.

I am not sure it adds to his number as this was not happening outside. I also have difficulty placing the outcome of this hunt within the three categories offered by the research. I suggest you make a quick guess in the poll at the right side of this blog.

Discovered yesterday: Susheela Raman - Maya

Efficiency

Do you think I might be exaggerating?

Anti-hand-made

Disclaimer: I think people who can create things – be it clothes, furniture, paper flowers or cast candlesticks - with their hands deserve all respect and admiration of the world. For their talent and for their skill.

Last Sunday we went to the Home Made Market here in The Hague.  It’s a lively one-day market where you can buy all kinds of non-mass-produced things. We got a necklace to give as a present, a pair of earrings for me and trousers for our baby daughter. All girly stuff I know. Somehow there was not much to be had for men.

Anyway. I’ve heard the words ‘hand-made’ nearly at every stand last Sunday. And here’s the thing: I am not surprised that sellers use the notion for their marketing so excessively often. Most people gifted with two right hands are not that original, they just copy each other. What does surprise me, is that other people buy it. As if ‘hand-made’ makes a product better by definition.

Now let’s get two things straight:
A) If you make clothes using a sewing machine, then your products are not much more hand-made than a random mass produced piece of apparel. This may come as a shock to you, but in big factories clothes parts are put together by real people (usually women) one piece at a time. Women behind sewing machines. They all use their hands for their work. Same goes for jewellery.

B) In many cases (I would even argue – in most) using machines instead of your bare hands makes your product better, not worse.

So please, stop giving me that ‘hand-made’ sh*t. Save time and money on marketing. Just make something original. I will buy it.

This guy didn’t say anything about hand-made. He didn’t say anything at all. I bought three pieces from him and will come back for more.

P.S. If I find the time, I'll photograph and show off my new earrings next time.